Again, "Gay or Jersey Answers" to the last post are featured in the comments section of this blog.
And even better, check out the write-up about the site on Gawker.com. Thank you, Gawker!
Now, let's get down to business:
Frankie's MySpace picture is so chock full of clues and red herrings that it's practically an episode of Lost.
The cheap frame in the background is SO Jersey. But if you look closer, it's a picture of a knight on one knee, before a lady in waiting. And what the heck is that pink thing on the door? (Then there're the wifebeater and awful over-tanning, but I think they cut both ways.)
One final clue is that Frankie wRiTEz LiKE DiZ oN HiZ PiCTUr CapShUnZ. Hrm... maybe he's not gay nor Jersey, but rather a ten year old Asian girl.
Pardon me. A ten year old aZn GurL.
Like many of the features on Gay or Jersey, John's a self-described "part-time model" (which presumably explains the copyright information on his Friendster photo). But even more than that, John's going for the double-double of being both illiterate and desperate (when asked who he wants to meet, John writes: "any1..hu wants 2 b mah friend..." Aw...).
Apparently, John's also a philosopher-poet -- a feat that's particularly commendable, given his aforementioned illiteracy. For example, John writes a "shoutout" on his profile that states: "sometimes d 1 dat u truly luv is d 1 hu wil gve u so mch pain.."
So true, John. So true.
John describes himself as: "simple hearthrob daw...hehehe... a man with a lot of dreams and hopes.."
While I can't decipher context clues that might help explain what "daw" means, I also have a lot of hopes for John. The top of that list would probably be that he might one day graduate from the Derek Zoolander Center For Children Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too.
Joseph's profile was seriously fucking with my mind. On the one hand, he has pictures like this up, where he's written the caption: "These arms are only for hugging." And he's got a picture of his mother's poodle.
So gay, right?
But then, he also has pictures of him in a dirty wifebeater and tiny bling, holding a fist full of borrowed hundred-dollar bills.
SO FUCKING JERSEY, right?
Furthermore, there're pictures of him and his friends, posing with guns. And then the clincher is a set of pictures of not just him posing in front of his car, but pictures of JUST his car.
There's nothing more Jersey than car pictures than the smell of Drakkar Noir steeped in urinal cakes and Old Spice Deodorant.
My mind can't take it. You figure it out.
Arthur lists his favorite movies as: "Bourne Identity, Bourne Supremacy, and the next."
Ordinarily, I would say that that doesn't tell you a goddamned thing about a person.
However, with Arthur, I get the feeling that this speaks volumes...
e. Bonus Question (the hard-to-find picture of a Gay or Jersey dude actually wearing a shirt): Scott
Scott writes on his MySpace page: "You and I both know that I'm a phenomenal dancer."
Dude, that statement really does say it all, doesn't it?
RETRACTION: Due to errors with a specific social networking site's "search" feature, it appears that John and Joseph were mistakenly included in today's post, as they are neither Gay NOR Jersey. We, the staff of GayOrJersey.com apologize for this oversight and assure you that we will make sure that our entries include only bona fide Gays or Jerseys. And we humbly apologize to John and Joseph for possibly leading people to believe that they were from Jersey.