Has anyone else noticed that New York's Bridge and Tunnel Crowd (otherwise known as "Jersey") has adopted the Chelsea look? These days, you can barely tell the overly-plucked, overly-shaved, overly-worked out Jersey Guidos trolling New York's streets for drunk women from the overly-plucked, overly-shaved, overly-worked out fellas down in Chelsea. This site documents "macho" Jersey's strange obsession with the gay look.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Please note that the Gay or Jersey "answers" to the previous post appear in this post's comments.

a. Matthew

Here's a hint that might help determine whether Matthew's Gay or Jersey: Matthew's page had shitty techno music. Incredibly shitty techno music.

And another hint: He's a personal trainer.

Okay, I'm just screwing with you, because those aren't hints. Few things are more Jersey AND Gay than personal trainers that listen to shitty techno music.

b. Jeremy

The actual caption that Jeremy wrote for this picture was: "me hott yes i know."

I don't know what's more astounding. His overwhelming sense of modesty or the fact that he's got the reading, spelling, and writing skills of a four year old.

c. Chris

This picture totally gives me the heebie jeebies (and that's a pretty bold statement, given that Armando's frightening picture from the last post didn't do the same).

But whether Chris is Gay or Jersey, he's also a pretty good candidate for being a frickin' serial killer, given this mug shot.

Does anyone else look at this picture and hear: "IT RUBS THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN OR IT GETS THE HOSE AGAIN"?

d. Paul

Paul not only leads his Friendster page with the line: "I just want to cuddle," but he's also emphasizes that he was in Phi Beta Kappa on his page.

This might explain why he doesn't have a single Friendster "testimonial" on a profile that's four years old.

But I digress. The fact that Paul is unequivocally a douche doesn't inform the inquiry of whether he's Gay or Jersey.

Or does it? Tricky, tricky...


And for our tiebreaker (otherwise known as the incredibly hard-to-find picture of a guy with his goddamned shirt on), we have Brelien.

When asked who he wants to meet, Brelien's response on his page is: "Just about anyone who wants to meet me!"

Oh, there's nothing more attractive than a man with no standards whatsoever.

Oh wait, yes there is: A man that's incredibly excited about having no standards whatsoever. Congratulations, dude.


Hank McCoy said...

So as for the Gay or Jersey "Answers" to the previous post:

a. Daniel

Gay. And given his picture, he's gay and aaaaaangry.

b. Carlos


c. Armando

Jersey. I particularly like Armando, because I have this stereotype of "greasy" Jersey guys. Armando (and Armando's body oil) thank you for keeping that stereotype alive.

d. Christopher

Jersey. Jersey and confused, is more like it.

e. Mad

Jersey. That about sums it up, actually: Mad is MAD Jersey.

rr said...

Great site. But it does raise some taxonomic questions, such as: what is the difference between a douchebag, a Jersey Guido, and a Chelsea homo?

Mr. Shain said...

So some people from Jersey aren't gay?